Discussion in 'Dallas Writers Room' started by Karin Schill, Oct 13, 2016.
HAHA for once I agree with Mitch!
Okay, I have no clue why that reply came through thrice-ly
Great update! I could easily see this scene played out on television!
I didn’t like Afton’s reply to her brother: “Mitch all kids get upset when they get a step-parent. She’ll get used to it!” I realize that what Afton said is most likely true in many step-parent situations, but I’d still like for her to show some more concern for her daughter’s well-being! After all, Becky is only 10 years old! And to force Becky into a new family without having her “consent” is harsh, IMO!
I got a good laugh out of Mitch’s comment: “I’m just saying that he makes Cliff Barnes look good!”
Afton sounded like a teenager in her last line: “Well as far as I’m concerned, you really don’t have a choice. He’s my fiancé and that’s not gonna change!”
Please share a whole lot more of this amazing fanfic with us!
Thank you everyone for the feedback on my story.
Sanda, you are right Afton needs to find out for herself who Mario actually is. If she wants to marry him there's nothing nobody can say to stop her. Or is there?
Tommie, I am glad that you found the dialogue funny. How odd that it posted the same reply three times. I have no clue why that happened, must have been a hick up with the system.
Ms Southworth, I think that what Afton said about kids being upset about getting a step-parent is probably true in a lot of cases. Especially if the children's parents have been together before and the kids are having a hard time to accept that they have divorced. The sad thing is that Afton truly believes that marrying Mario will be the best thing for her and also her daughter.
Okay so in tonight's update it's time for a business meeting...
At Stonehurst, the male secretary showed JR into Marilee’s office, where he found Marilee standing over by the bar, “JR, nice to see you, can I get you a drink?”
“Sure get me a bourbon and branch,” JR replied, as he took off his hat and sat down.
“You got it,” Marilee replied, as she fixed JR his drink. Then she walked over to him.
“Thank you,” JR took the glass that Marilee handed him.
“So what did you want to discuss?”
“Well first of all I must say that I’m disappointed in you Marilee.”
“What are you talking about?” Marilee shifted nervously.
“Like you don’t know,” JR paused. “Why did you invite Cliff Barnes to join the cartel?”
“Oh you’ve heard about that huh?” Marilee said sheepishly.
“Damn right I have,” JR replied. “You know nothing gets by old JR in this town!”
“I guess not,” Marilee asked. “So is that why you’re here, to discuss Cliff Barnes?”
“Nah,” JR shook his head. “If you wanna work with that idiot it’s your problem, not mine.”
“So what is it then?”
“I want out of our deal,” JR said.
Marilee coughed on her drink, “I’m sorry, what?”
“You heard me,” JR replied. “I’m looking for some quick cash so I’m offering you to buy me out!”
“I see. But are you sure that’s such a good idea?” Marilee licked her lips nervously. “I mean a field like this doesn’t come along every day!”
“That might be but I need the cash now and can’t afford to wait for this long term investment to pay off.”
“I don’t understand, what’s happened?” Marilee asked. “Everything seemed fine two weeks ago!”
“Well after Bobby came back from Houston we realized that we’ve expanded a bit too much,” JR explained. “So we need to sell off something and frankly I am not sure I really trust you.”
“Don’t be silly JR,” Marilee laughed. “We’re old friends so you should know by now that you can trust me!”
“Well that’s what I thought, before I saw you with Barnes at that awful movie premiere!”
“Oh that,” Marilee sighed. “I’m sorry JR but it was the event of the weekend and someone from Sue Ellen’s office sent us free tickets to it.”
“You mean to tell me that you thought Sue Ellen invited you?”
“Yes that’s what I thought,” Marilee lied. “I didn’t know what the movie was about until after I’ve seen it and let me tell you that movie was god damn awful!”
“Alright then, I believe you,” JR sighed. “However I still need to sell my half of our deal!”
“I’m sorry JR but I can’t afford to buy it,” Marilee lied.
JR raised an eyebrow upon hearing that, “You can’t?”
“No my son Bruce and Heather just bought themselves a refinery that Alan and I invested in. I’m just as strapped for cash right now as you are,” Marilee explained.
“I’m sorry to hear that,” JR said. “So what do you suggest that we sell the whole deal to someone else?”
“No, I’ve got a better idea,” Marilee said. “How about freezing it for a while until we can afford to start drilling?”
“Well I guess we could do that,” JR sighed. “However that doesn’t solve my situation.”
“You know if you’re looking to sell some smaller field, I know a rather new started company in Galveston that’s looking to buy. I can give them a call for you if you’d want!”
“Well thanks Marilee that would help a lot.”
“Sure what are friends for,” Marilee smiled relieved, since her quick thinking had just saved her from getting stuck with the entire dry field. Yet the incident had taught her something valuable, since she now knew that she could win over JR at his own game…
I know adults who still fantasize about their divorced parents finding their way back together (even though both parents now are involved with or married to other really nice and likeable people).
I guess that children of a divorced family never really give up in their hearts on reuniting their family again (even though it makes no logical sense ... and also if their parents are happier apart than together).
However, the thing with Afton is that she seems determined to continue a relationship with a man whom her daughter has no relationship with at this point in time! Becky doesn’t even like him! For Afton to even consider marriage right now, when things are as bad as they are, is just so sad! I feel so bad for Becky! Her mom needs to give her daughter more time to adjust! (And perhaps it’ll give Afton a chance to reconsider if marrying Mario is really the best option)!
Interesting business meeting between Marilee and JR! I wonder how she plans to beat him at his own game ... ... ... and if she succeeds!
Please update soon!
... ... I know that it's summer time right now in Karin's fanfic, but will they celebrate Halloween when October comes around? ... ...
If so, what will all the characters dress up like?
Thank you everyone for the feedback.
Ms Southworth, you are probably right that some adults still wants their divorced parents to get back together again.
I think Afton believes that Mario and Becky will grow to like each other when they get to know each other better.
Then as for JR and Marilee. The beating JR at his own game reference was to the fact that JR wanted to sell Marilee the worthless field Marilee and Cliff had fooled JR into buying. But Marilee managed to trick JR into keeping his half of the deal. It's a JR trick thing to do so she beat him at his own game. See?
Halloween is still far off in this story but yeah we actually have two Halloweens in this story.
Oh and we have a masquerade too, which is actually coming up a lot sooner!
So any guesses what the characters will dress out as?
Shan, I'm glad you think the updates were fantastic. Also I am curious since you like John Ross and Pamela Rebecca on the new show, what did you think of the scene where they first met in this story?
Come to think of it, you should restart the John Ross and PamBecca appreciation thread on the Dallas TNT board.
I also really liked them as a couple on the show.
But naturally they won't be a couple in this story though as Becky is still just a kid.
Okay so time for tonight's update:
Upstairs in Lucy and Mitch room, Mitch was sitting on the side of the bed staring at his mobile when Lucy walked into the room. “Hi,” Lucy greeted him with a kiss before she sat down on the side of the bed. “So what did Afton say?” Lucy asked, but then she saw the expression on Mitch’s face. “It’s true, isn’t it?
Mitch sighed, “Unfortunately yes…”
“Oh no!” Lucy sighed. “Poor Becky. What are we gonna do?”
Mitch picked up his phone, “Well since she won’t listen to me maybe she’ll listen to Mom.” Mitch started to dial the number.
However Lucy stopped him from placing the call by yanking the phone away from him saying, “Mitch that is not a good idea!”
“’Cause if you tell your mom and she starts nagging on Afton it’s just gonna get the opposite effect!”
“You mean that she would marry that guy just out of spite?”
Lucy shrugged her shoulders, “Yeah well that’s what I would have done in my younger days!”
Mitch raised an eyebrow, “Oh really?”
“Yeah really,” Lucy smiled.
“Always a rebel, aren’t you?” Mitch said in a teasing tone. “So who did you spite to marry me?”
Lucy smiled teasingly at him, “Oh I could think of a few…”
Mitch grabbed a hold of her pulling her up into his lap saying, “Oh you!” Before they exchanged a kiss. Then Mitch sighed, “So what should I do about my sister?”
Lucy sighed, “Hold off for now. Hopefully she'll realizes who that jerk is.”
“And if she doesn’t?”
Lucy pulled her hand through Mitch hair. “Then we’ll deal with that problem when we get there. Ok?”
Mitch nodded saying, “You know I love you.”
“And I love you,” Lucy said and they kissed again.
I am glad that Lucy and Mitch are happy in your story because I always thought it was pointless to have them remarry in the original series only to split up again three years later...
Beautiful scene with Lucy and Mitch!
I really liked their conversation and its outcome! Lucy has really grown up a lot! And I love it! She is so ready to experience motherhood, so I wonder when it'll be her time!
Please update soon!
PS. Thanks so much for explaining "Marilee beating JR at his own game"! It makes perfect sense, and I guess that I had forgotten some details to be able to pick up on it.
Thank you for the feedback everyone.
Tommie, I agree with you that it was pointless to have Lucy and Mitch remarry and then divorce on the show.
But I guess the remarriage was done to give Lucy a happy ending when Charlene left the show in 1985. However when the fans wanted Charlene to come back in 1988 the producers apparantly didn't want to bring back Mitch too so hence Lucy & Mitch divorce.
I think it would have been better if Lucy and Mitch would have moved to "Knots Landing" instead of Atlanta as it would have enabled us to see their second marriage and I think they would have fitted in well on that show. I mean Lucy's parents were already on the show so it would have opened up new storyline possibilities for the characters.
Ms Southworth, you are right when you say that Lucy has grown up a lot. She is an adult in her 30's now. So she's at a completely different stage in life than on the original show when she was the teen rebel to start with. So yes I would agree with you that Lucy's ready for motherhood.
Okay so here's tonight's update:
On Wednesday evening, in Bobby and Pam’s room, Bobby was laying in bed reading a book when Rebecca entered the room. “Daddy?”
“Rebecca what are you doing up?” Bobby asked surprised, as he put the book away.
“I couldn’t sleep.”
“But why not?”
“Because I kept thinking about my things back home,” Rebecca pouted.
“Yes in our house in Los Angeles!” Rebecca confirmed and Bobby looked troubled when he heard that.
“But I thought you had started to think of Southfork as your home…”
“I do most of the time,” Rebecca explained. “But I still have to call someone back in Los Angeles.”
“Yes, I want my CD player. I always listen to it when I can’t sleep.”
“I’m sorry to hear that sweetie. Hey how about that I’ll buy you a new CD player tomorrow?”
“No I want my purple one!” Rebecca whined.
“Alright we arrange for someone to send it over tomorrow.”
“No I want to do it now!”
“You can’t call Los Angeles now. It’s late and everyone’s already at sleep.”
“Not in Los Angeles, they are two hours behind us!” Rebecca insisted. “Now give me mommy’s cell phone!”
“But Rebecca your mom’s in the shower!”
“Then I’ll find it myself,” Rebecca said naughtily before she walked over to the dresser and started to go through Pam’s purse. “Here it is, found it!” Rebecca’s face cracked up in a smile, as she pulled out the mobile phone.
“No Rebecca, give me mommy’s phone!”
“No, I’m calling!” Rebecca refused to listen to her daddy, as she hurried to press speed dial and waited.
“Rebecca you know you’re not allowed to use your mom’s phone!” Bobby scolded his disobedient daughter. “Give me the phone!” Bobby snatched the phone from Rebecca’s hands just when a man’s voice answered on the other end of the line.
“Pam, I was worrying sick. Why haven’t you returned my calls before?”
“This is not Pam,” Bobby replied grumpily, as he didn’t like that Pam had another man’s number on speed dial in her phone one bit.
“Oh,” the man said disappointed. “Who am I talking to then?”
“This is Bobby Ewing and we’re calling because Rebecca wants to have her CD player sent to Southfork Ranch in Braddock, Texas.”
“Oh Rebecca’s she’s such a cute child, so much like her mom. Will you tell her hi from me?”
“I could if I knew who you are…” Bobby said. “Aren’t you gonna tell me?”
“No, Pam knows who I am. Will you please give her my love too and ask her to please call me?”
“I would if I knew who you are…” Bobby tried again to find out more about the mystery man who obviously was someone Pam knew quite well. Unfortunately the man didn’t offer any more information before he hung up. “Damn he hung up on me!” Bobby cursed, when he could hear the dial up tone.
“Who hung up?” Rebecca asked innocently.
“The guy you called!” Bobby replied angrily, as he stood there with Pam’s cell phone in his hand. He looked shocked and bitter as he said, “Who the hell was that?”
“You were talking to Richard,” Rebecca informed Bobby.
Bobby frowned as the name sounded familiar. After thinking it over he realized that it must be the same guy Rebecca had mentioned at the breakfast table the other day, “The guy your mom goes shopping with?”
“Yeah among other things,” Rebecca said innocently and Bobby grimaced as he didn’t like the sound of that.
An uncomfortable silence lingered in the air when Pam suddenly came out of the shower. “Oh that was so nice…” Pam smile faded away from her face when she noticed the troubled look on Bobby’s face. Then she spotted her daughter and exclaimed, “Rebecca what are you doing up?”
“Daddy and I called Richard,” Rebecca smiled sweetly.
“You did what?!” Pam exclaimed, as she regretted ever having asked.
“I wanted my CD player. Daddy told him to send it here,” Rebecca shrugged her shoulders like it was no big deal. She was happily unaware of what she had done. Pam glanced over at Bobby who didn’t look happy.
“Who is Richard?” Bobby asked in a no nonsense tone of voice. The color faded from Pam’s face and she walked over towards the window, looking out into the night. She’d known the moment she had moved back to Southfork that it would only be a matter of time before the truth came out. Yet she’d been hoping that it wouldn’t happen yet as she had no idea of how to break the news to Bobby…
To be continued...
Great updates Karin! I am so happy that Lucy and Mitch are remarried and that they are both acting more mature in your story than they did on the show. The writers were stupid to break up them again after they re-married and they moved to Atlanta. Mitch should have been brought back on the show with Lucy at the beginning season 10 to be Pam's doctor after her accident since he was a plastic surgeon. Lucy and Mitch could have had realistic fights on the show related to Mitch's job as a doctor and him not being able to talk to Lucy about Pam's condition because doctor/patient confidentially vs them constantly arguing about Mitch working to many hours or Lucy being rich and Mitch being poor. Their arguments got old rather fast. I am also happy that Bobby and Pam are finally a family with their daughter Rebecca and their son Christopher but I am not happy that Bobby is so upset right now because of Richard. I am wondering how Richard fits into Pam and Rebecca's lives back in LA even though Pam was very wrong in my opinion not telling Bobby right a way about Richard right after they reconnected in LA and before Bobby met their daughter Rebecca but I will let Pam explain to Bobby about her and Rebecca's relationship with Richard after they both tuck Rebecca back in bed before I get too upset with her.
Already time for the final scene of episode 9? I just really dislike the three little words ... ... "to be continued"!
But on the other hand ... ... you did end the episode with an amazing scene! 10 out of 10 points!
First of all, it was a good thing that Bobby and Pam weren't "going at it", since they apparently left their bedroom door unlocked once again!
Cute dialogue between Bobby and Rebecca! Very believable, IMO! Once children have their heart set on one particular toy, nothing else is good enough ... even if it would seem to be the "same" for us adults! For instance, I can't count how many times my children have wanted a different teddy bear than the one they'd (or I'd) brought along on a weekend trip! Endless and fairly pointless discussions about something that can't be dealt with at that very minute! Great job, Rebecca!
On one hand, I kind of figured that Rebecca would still consider L.A. to be her home! Especially, since Pam nor Bobby have bothered to have the house emptied and their stuff sent to Dallas. To me, it would also seem appropriate for Pam and Rebecca to go back to L.A. to say "goodbye" to the house that was their home for a long time and also to their friends etc. Thus, I'm not surprised that Rebecca is somewhat "homesick".
On the other hand, I completely understand why Bobby is saddened and troubled that Rebecca (still) doesn't consider Southfork her home. Especially now that Bobby and Pam have their family of four back together under one roof!
Hmmm ... ... my eyebrows went up, when I read Rebecca's line: “But I still have to call someone back in Los Angeles.” A seven year old girl has someone she needs to call?
LOL ... ... only Rebecca's very own purple CD player will satisfy her! And she's one persistent little lady: “Now give me mommy’s cell phone ... ... I'll find it myself ... ... Here it is, found it!!!”
Great dialogue between Bobby and the man on the phone who refused to give his name!
I can't wait to figure out who this guy Richard is to both Pam and Rebecca! For Richard to say “Pam knows who I am. Will you please give her my love too and ask her to please call me?” makes me think that he probably isn't a love interest of hers. After all, Richard didn't seem surprised or jealous of the fact that a man answered Pam's phone! Also, Richard didn't seem to blink an eye when Bobby stated his name and address!
Let me just say: I'm NOT a fan of Bobby cursing, not once but twice in front of his daughter! Shame on you, Bobby!
I love the way you wrote Rebecca's lines towards the end of the scene! Rebecca acting and responding all innocent was not only funny, but it also made me even more convinced that Richard isn't someone Pam was romantically involved with! Otherwise, Rebecca would be scared at this point, since it potentially could mean her parents breaking up!
Oh, I would have loved to watch it on-screen, when Rebecca sweetly said: “Daddy and I called Richard”!
Okay, let's hear the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help me God!!! WHO IS RICHARD TO PAM AND TO REBECCA?
And please don't leave us hanging for too long this time, Karin! :thank: One week at the most, okay? :vote:
I always just figured they brought Lucy back so that if you hadn't watched the show for a while and tuned in during season 11, you would think they still had most of the cast intact--when in reality, most of Lucy's appearances were confined to the opening credits.
Great updates ...... IMO Richard is a business associate of Pam's no romantic interest. Richard would be on a flight to Dallas searching for her or hunting her down if he was !
Thank you everyone for the feedback! I so enjoy reading your comments. :idea:
Sanda, I agree with you that it would have made more sense to bring back Lucy and Mitch on the show after Pam's accident. I wish they had done it that way.
I agree that Pam should have been honest with Bobby about Richard from the start. But she had a reason not to tell him...
Ms Southworth, I am glad that you thought the episode ended on a good cliffhanger. We do try to find interesting places to end the episodes. Sometimes we succeed and sometimes we don't as there are some really uninteresting ends to the episodes too.
Good that we wrote Rebecca in a realistic way for her age.
Also having moved when I was Rebecca's age I can totally understand why she still thinks of LA as her home. I think it took me years to stop missing my old hometown and friends after we moved.
You are right when you say that Rebecca doesn't consider Richard a threat to her parents relationship.
You will find out in the next scene who he is to Pam and Rebecca...and I promise you don't have to wait too long since I will definitely start posting the next episode in the upcoming week...
Silvie, thanks for the emoticons.
Tommie, I think the reason they brought Lucy back was due to fans demanding it in letters etc. So bringing her back was a way to try to please the fans.
However I agree with you that they really should have put her to better use when she returned and given her approprioate and interesting stories. Maybe she should have come back, divorced with a young child and we would have to see her struggles of being a single mom. I think that would have evolved her character.
Pammy, but if Richard is a business associate of Pam's what business would that have been?
I mean Pam just told Bobby in an earlier update that she had been a stay at home mom with Rebecca and had not worked at all while living in LA!
Anyway more light will be shed on this Richard character in the next episode among several other things so stay tuned...
Also I am curious due to our new function "Users who have read this thread" I can see that @Richard Channing @cathy duffy , @zephiey and @Lizzy Ewing have visited this thread in the past month. So I was wondering are you keeping up with this story?
If you are I would love to hear what you think of it. So feel free to join in the discussion anytime.
No pressure of course. If you prefer to remain lurkers I will have to respect that...
Hi Karin. Actually I'm not into reading fanfics but occasionally as I scroll down the recent activity someone's comment in this thread will catch my eye, so that's why you see my name below. But congratulations on the popularity of the thread, a lot off people seem to be enjoying your fanfic.
Separate names with a comma.