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Vow of Silence

Discussion in 'Dallas Writers Room' started by Ray&Donna, Mar 5, 2018.

  1. Ray&Donna

    Ray&Donna Soap Chat TV Fanatic

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    Another story from the old forum, one that was emailed to me, having miraculously been saved by a devoted reader :) I hope you enjoy it--it takes a different look at an encounter Ray and Donna might have had following their divorce ;)

    ***


    June 9, 1989

    It was late spring, but the sun had already begun to bake the sidewalks of Georgetown. As he stared up at the townhouse, he struggled to remember what he was doing here. Then it hit him—Margaret was two years old now, and this week was to be the longest period of time he’d ever spent with her. His only child, and probably the only child he’d ever have. He looked up and down the street. Not a lot of cowboys in this part of the country, and he couldn’t help but feel out of place. He pushed his hat back, planted his feet firmly, and rang the doorbell. After a few seconds, the door opened, and there she stood. The most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Her eyes were still the same shade of blue, and she was beginning to grow her blonde hair long again, just the way it had been when they first met. She smiled at him.

    “Hi,” she said.

    “Hi,” he replied, almost robotically. Not completely sure of what to do next, he bent down and gave her a kiss on the cheek, which she returned.

    “You look good,” she said. “How have you been?”

    “I’m good,” he replied.

    “Come in,” she said. He looked around the entry hall. The house was ornate, and he couldn’t help but think that it didn’t fit Donna. It didn’t seem like she had decorated it herself. One thing he liked about her, she had always looked at home either running a political fundraiser or riding across the range to see him. Here, for the first time, he thought she looked out of place.
    She turned to him. “You should get yourself settled in. You don’t mind staying on the third floor, do you?”

    He picked up his suitcase and walked behind her. “To tell you the truth, I’d probably be more comfortable in a hotel.”

    “I know you would, but you’d never get to see Margaret then. Maybe a little in the morning, but she’s pretty active in the evening so you’d miss all that. And you don’t get to see her enough as it is.”

    “I wish I could come more often. Every day I feel like I miss something I should be seeing.”

    She turned and looked at him. “Would you ever think about moving back to this side of the world? There are some beautiful farms in Virginia and good schools for her children.”

    He sat down his suitcase. “You know I couldn’t ask her to uproot our lives again just so I could see my child whenever I wanted. Life doesn’t work that way.”

    She smiled at him wistfully. “I’m sorry I brought it up—it’s not my place to try to run your life.”

    “Don’t worry.” He placed his hand on her shoulder. “I wasn’t offended.”

    She smiled at him again. “Let’s get your stuff upstairs so you can get settled in. Then there’s someone I know who’s waiting to see you.”

    The townhouse had an elevator, a convenience Ray certainly wasn’t used to. When it opened on the top floor he followed Donna out and down the hall. She opened the door and took him into a bedroom that overlooked the street. She went over and pushed open the curtains on the windows.

    “I hope it’s okay. There’s clean sheets, and towels in the bathroom. You have your own.”

    “It looks fine. I’ll just leave my suitcase on the bed for now and unpack later.”

    “Okay.” He closed the door as they left the room and headed back downstairs.

    She opened the door to Margaret’s room. She was laying her on bed but had begun to stir. Donna walked over to her and sat down on the edge of the mattress. She brushed the hair out of the girl’s face.

    “Hey there, sleepyhead. Remember I told you someone was coming to see you? He’s here.”

    Ray looked down at her and smiled. Her eyes were now open. “Hi,” he said.

    She gave him kind of strange look, like she wasn’t sure about who he was. He then picked her up and she stared at him for a moment. Donna tickled her hand. “You remember who this is, don’t you? This is your daddy.”

    “Daddy,” she said as she smiled up at him. He could feel his eyes begin to water, but tried to shrug it off. It bothered him to think his daughter had to be reminded who he was, and he wondered if he would ever be able to develop the kind of relationship with her wanted.

    “She has your eyes, you know,” Donna said.

    Ray smiled as he held her. “Yeah, I just noticed that. She’s got your hair, though—and your smile.”

    “Well, I can see you in her smile too. No one would ever mistake her for anyone else’s daughter.” She thought her words had an accidental sting to them, but he winced before she could notice. Figuring it was time to move on to other things, Donna smiled as she watched both of them. “Let’s go downstairs and spend some time together in the family room. She has some toys in there she can play with.”

    “Toys,” she repeated. Ray laughed. He let Donna carry Margaret downstairs, since she was still getting used to him.
     
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  2. Ray&Donna

    Ray&Donna Soap Chat TV Fanatic

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  3. Ray's Lady

    Ray's Lady Soap Chat Member

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    Thanks for reposting. I remember this story. So well written.
     
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  4. Mrs Bobby James Ewing

    Mrs Bobby James Ewing Soap Chat Fan

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    Great start to your new story Ray&Donna.:) I love reading stories about Mr and Mrs Krebbs and their daughter Margaret. :)
     
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  5. Karin Schill

    Karin Schill Super Moderator Staff Member

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    Yay a new "old" story to read. :spinning:
    I can't remember if I've read this before or not. I think I used to be most into reading the JR/SE centered fanfics before the board crash and there used to be plenty of those.

    Anyway I look forward to read this. Is Donna still married to Andrew?
    I assumed from her comments that Ray is still married to Jenna.
     
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  6. Ray&Donna

    Ray&Donna Soap Chat TV Fanatic

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    Yes, this story (mostly) follows the continuity of the show. :)

    ***

    They sat together in the family room, playing together and laughing like one big happy family. Donna always knew that Ray would be a great father; it seemed to come natural to him, but she had never had the chance to see him do it much. She wondered if he enjoyed other children as much as Margaret. Despite her initial confusion she was quickly warming to Ray. She wanted Margaret to know her father and know what a good man he was, no matter where he lived.

    “Ray?” she said.

    “Yeah?” He turned to her and smiled.

    “Would you like something for lunch? Margaret will probably be hungry by now, too.”

    “That would be great.” He stood up and picked Margaret up out of the floor. He followed Donna to the kitchen. He placed Margaret in her high chair and buckled her in. “Do you usually do your own cooking?”

    She laughed. “We usually have someone come in to cook. I’m good, but I’ve never learned quite how to make dinner for a gang of senators.”

    “I guess I can understand that.”

    She talked while she worked. “This year has been so busy that most of the time I’m just trying to feed Margaret and myself, and we usually don’t eat the same things.”

    “So I guess you haven’t fixed her a bowl of Miss Ellie’s chili yet, huh?”

    She laughed. “No, she’s still a bit young for that--maybe when she’s three.” She went to the refrigerator to look for something and there was an audible silence. Ray didn’t want there to be a lot of awkwardness between them this week, at least not if they could avoid it.

    “Will Andrew be home later?” he asked. As soon as the words left his lips he regretted saying them.

    She stopped and looked at him. “No, he probably won’t be home for another week. It’s an election year so he’s busy in his home state campaigning.” She turned and went back to work. A series of strange thoughts raced through Ray’s mind. “Oh. So he didn’t mind me coming to stay while he was gone?”

    “He didn’t seem to, but then he’s been preoccupied lately. His seat is contested this year.”

    “I guess that puts a lot of pressure on him.”

    “It really does. He’s been in office for a long time and I think it upsets him that someone younger could come in and replace him.”

    Ray paused before speaking—he didn’t know politics and wasn’t sure what to ask. “Are you going to be helping him any?”

    “If I can, but there’s really not much I can do.” She put a plate in front of him. “I remembered that you liked eggs for lunch sometimes.”

    “Thank you,” he said. She sat down across from him and began to pick at her salad. Margaret was sorting through her food, taking what she didn’t want and placing it into a pile on her tray table.

    “Does she always do that?”

    “Uh-huh. I don’t know how she gets enough in her mouth to get any nourishment, but she does. Her pediatrician said she’s healthy and normal for her age--the perfect little girl.”

    “Listen, as long as I’m here I thought we should try to do something interesting. I’ve never gotten to tour Washington before.”

    “That’s true. Listen, why don’t we go to the Smithsonian tomorrow? I know Margaret would enjoy getting to spend the whole day with you.”

    “You don’t have any other commitments?”

    “None. If you can believe it, I devote my life to her.” She smiled at him. “It’ll be time for her nap soon, so once she goes to sleep we can talk more.”

    “Okay. I think I’d like that.”

    With Margaret down for a nap, the two of them sat together in the den. It was hard for either of them to find words to describe what it was like for them to be together again, not as lovers this time but merely parents to the same child. Ray figured he should at least get one thing out of the way first.

    “Are you going to ask me about her?”

    “I wasn’t going to pry. I figured if you wanted to talk about her you would. I guess your life is none of my business, though.”

    “We don’t have to talk about her if you don’t want to. It doesn’t matter to me.”


    “You were the one who brought it up.” She paused, not sure where to go next. “Have you talked to anyone in Dallas lately?”

    “Yeah, I talked with Miss Ellie last week. She and Clayton are doing great. Bobby and Pam are really happy, too. The kids are all doing real well.”

    “I’m glad to hear it. I miss all of them. I’d like to visit sometime but I don’t know if it would be right.”

    “I think everybody would be glad to see you. They still think of you as family.”

    “I like to think of them as my family, too. Maybe sometime soon I can go visit them. It really has been too long since I was in Texas.”

    “Would you ever go back for good if you could?”

    “I think so. There are so many good memories there for me not to want to go back.” She smiled at him. He smiled back, and she felt an emotion that she wasn’t sure she could describe. She needed to break up the tension.

    “Would you like something to drink?” she asked.

    He nodded. “You know, it’s hard to find good bourbon in Switzerland, so I’ll have some of that if you’ve got it.”

    “I think we might just have some.” She went to the liquor cabinet and pulled out two glasses, pouring some for each of them. She placed the bottle back inside and carried the glasses over to him. She sat down in front of him, handing him his glass.

    “How about a toast,” he offered.

    “What would you like to toast to?”

    “How about we toast to this week? Let’s toast to having a good time with our daughter.”

    “Okay”. The clinked glasses and each of them took a drink.

    It felt really strange for the two of them, being face-to-face and alone like this. Ray smiled and tried to think of a way to overcome the deafening silence that now began to settle over them.

    ***

    He lay in bed that night, staring ahead as the moon shone outside his window. It was strange for him to be here, in this house, with Donna sleeping just beneath him downstairs. It had been so long since he had seen her, nearly a year, and she still looked so beautiful that she took his breath away. There was a heat between them that he didn’t want to feel and yet couldn’t deny. Or did he want to feel it? There was no passion in his life now, no vitality, only a stretch of endless days where one was no more remarkable than the one before. Donna made him feel alive, just being around her, but she seemed different now. He couldn’t put his finger on it, but she seemed to have a sadness about her. It wasn’t really his place to ask so he didn’t want to say anything to her about it. He couldn’t deny at this moment that somewhere deep inside him a fire still burned for her.

    ***

    She sat in Margaret’s room that evening, making sure she was asleep. She had been asleep for nearly a half hour, but Donna hadn’t yet willed herself to go to her own room and be alone.

    She had felt something today, and she wondered if he felt it too. She didn’t want to admit that she could still have feelings for him. They were both married to other people now; they had chosen different paths in life and it wasn’t meant for them to be together. If it didn’t work the first time, she thought, what guarantee would we have that we could ever make it work? She tried to push that part of her life out of her mind, into the past where it belonged. She kissed Margaret good night and closed the door behind her as she left the room. She went into her room and stared out the window. His room was just above hers and she wondered if maybe, just maybe, he was doing the same thing right now. She removed her robe and slid under the blankets. She wasn’t sure if she’d ever felt this lonely before. She ached to be with someone, someone she knew she couldn’t have.
     
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  7. Ray's Lady

    Ray's Lady Soap Chat Member

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    Donna and Ray belong together. Sending him - the cowboy - to Switzerland never made sense.
     
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  8. Karin Schill

    Karin Schill Super Moderator Staff Member

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    Oh I agree Tiani, Ray in Switzerland with Jenna was an odd way to end the characters story on the show.

    Tommie, I loved how there's still feelings stirring between Ray and Donna and how they are all alone with Margaret in her house. I wonder how long it will take them before they will act on it. I mean after all they have both broken their marital vows before so fidelity is not their strong suit... ;)
     
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  9. Ray&Donna

    Ray&Donna Soap Chat TV Fanatic

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    June 10, 1989

    The next morning they went out for breakfast before sightseeing. Until this trip they’d never had a meal alone together as a family—there had always been someone else around. When Ray watched Margaret he could see himself in her eyes, and he could tell she was smart. He wasn’t dumb by any stretch but he knew she took after her mother. He also knew that he wasn’t cultured, but he didn’t mind Donna taking him on a tour of the city today. Donna smiled at him as they walked down the street. She felt as though she never did anything fun anymore, that everything had become so mundane.

    She seemed to have a lilt in her voice as she recalled times past. “You know, I can still remember the first time Sam Culver ever took me through all of these buildings. I’d never been east of the Mississippi before, so this seemed like a whole different world to me.”

    He watched her as she recounted her experiences. “How does it feel now?”

    “Still kind of funny sometimes. Like I don’t fit, I don’t belong. Do you know what I mean?”

    “Yeah.”

    “I guess it’s the same with your ranch.”

    “Yeah, it’s just not the same. I always wanted my own ranch, a piece of Texas I could call my own. Almost as soon as I had it I gave it up.”

    She smiled at him. “You know what, Ray?”

    “What?”

    “We’re starting to sound like two bitter old people whose lives didn’t work out the way they’d hoped.”

    “I’m sorry. We really should be trying to have a good time.”

    “I’m sorry too.”

    Margaret interrupted as she pointed her finger skyward. “Look, Daddy!” They could see the U.S. Capitol building down the street, and she seemed particularly enamored by the dome.

    “Well, little lady, I think you’ve just picked out where we’re going next.”

    He felt Donna grab his hand as they crossed the street together, and even though he knew he should’ve, he didn’t let go.

    ***

    By the middle of the day they were walking down the National Mall, amongst all the museums. Margaret was enjoying herself and didn’t seem to notice the awkwardness between her parents. They didn’t notice, either, that the awkwardness was slowly but surely evaporating.

    The afternoon was coming to an end as they finally made their way down to the end of the Mall.
    Donna looked at Ray as they stood there. “We should probably sit down and rest.”

    Ray sat down gingerly on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial; Margaret had fallen asleep on his shoulder and was safely in a dream-world.

    “Looks like someone had too much fun today,” he said.

    “I had fun, too. It was really nice to spend some time with you. It seems like the last few years we would just kind of fight when we were together, or be cold to each other. I never wanted

    that,” she replied.

    “Neither did I. I’ll try harder not to be that way in the future. I want Margaret to grow up knowing that even if her parents aren’t together, they don’t hate each other.”

    “Ray, I could never hate you.” She paused. “Especially not after you bought me lunch today.”

    He looked at her and laughed. “I guess I’ll never be able to find a good steak unless I go back home, huh?”

    “Well, I could take you someplace tomorrow to find a good one, but no, not as good as one they have at Southfork.”

    “I think that would be great.”

    They sat there together, watching the school kids and families who were walking alongside the reflecting pool, posing for pictures or stopping at a stand to buy souvenirs. They wondered, silently, what it would be like to have an uncomplicated life, one where they could be together and do the things normal families did.

    Donna broke the silence. “Would you like me to take her?”

    “No, I’m fine. I think she drooled on my shirt, but I’m okay.”

    “Okay,” she said. She smiled at him, and her heart fluttered as he smiled back. The way a smile broke across his face still drove her crazy.

    “We should head back, I guess. I need to have something ready for Margaret to eat when she finally wakes up. I guess today really tired her out.”

    Ray stood and held his hand out to help her up. “I’m pretty worn out, myself.” He still held Margaret with his other arm.

    Donna grabbed his hand and stood. “Thank you. I knew chivalry wasn’t dead. I guess you’re probably ready to eat by now, too.”

    “I guess I am.” They walked toward the street. “You should let me cook for you one night.”

    “I might be persuaded to let you do just that.”
     
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  10. Karin Schill

    Karin Schill Super Moderator Staff Member

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    Great update with Donna and Ray sightseeing with Margaret.

    Oh and this line I can totally identify myself with it since it's so true that life doesn't work out the way you think it will when you are younger.
     
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  11. Ray&Donna

    Ray&Donna Soap Chat TV Fanatic

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    June 10, 1989

    Margaret sat in her high chair once again, shoving some of the food in her mouth and the rest of it into a pile. Her parents were sitting there, finishing their dinner and laughing. It was the most that either of them had laughed in a long, long time.

    “His face after I pushed him in that pool! He looked like a drowned rat in a business suit.”

    “Well, he was!”

    “We really had some fun times back then. Does anyone live in our old brick house now?”

    Ray wiped at his mouth with a napkin. “The last time I was there, it was still empty. The grass had grown up to about knee-high on me. I finally borrowed a lawnmower and cut it myself. I couldn’t bear to see it look that way.”

    “You never were one for an unkempt lawn. Shame no one’s bought the old house, though.”

    “Yeah, I guess maybe since I built it for myself it just didn’t suit anyone else.”

    “Maybe someday, when Margaret is a little older, I’ll take her to visit her old family and to see the house where she was…” She stopped and smiled to herself.

    Ray laughed. “Did you embarrass yourself?”

    “I guess I did. Forgive me.”

    “No need to apologize.” He noticed she was done eating. “Do you need any help cleaning up?”

    “No, I can throw everything in the dishwasher. You could help me clean up Margaret though.”

    “Great, give me the hard job!” he kidded.

    “You did ask…”

    “I know—I’m just kidding.” Donna handed him a wet washcloth. He pulled the tray off the chair and started to wipe off Margaret’s face. “Hi Daddy,” she said.

    “Hi,” he said. “You’re a cute kid, but you sure are messy.” She laughed at him.

    “She is that,” Donna said as she loaded the dishwasher. “As soon as you get done, you should take her in the other room to play. I can finish cleaning up in here.”

    “Okay, we’re done.” He unbuckled her and put her on the floor. She grabbed his finger and led him through the house. Donna smiled to herself as she watched them disappear. It was just like the way things should’ve been but could never be now. She finished loading the dishwasher and then went to join them.

    She found them inside Margaret’s playhouse. Ray appeared to be wedged in there, with no way of getting out anytime soon. Margaret kept going in and out of the house to bring toys to Ray. Donna stood and watched them from the doorway. Ray noticed her and smiled.

    “Would you like me to bring a pillow and blanket so you can sleep in there tonight?”

    “Is that my only option?”

    “Now you know you’re never supposed to answer a question with a question.” She shook her head at him, smiling the whole time.

    “Good point. I think I could probably get out of here, but she still seems happy so I’ll wait.”

    “Oh believe me, I know. I stay in there sometimes for what seems like hours. She loves it.”

    “She really seems to.”

    “Listen, I need to go upstairs and get her bath ready. Will you be okay without me?”

    “Sure,” he said, smiling at her reassuringly. He could hear her walk across the front hall and up the stairs. He thought to himself, what am I doing here? He was having these strong feelings and urges that he knew he should fight at all costs. He didn’t want to have these thoughts, but at the same time he didn’t feel guilty. The years he had been with Donna, he had to admit to himself every day, were the happiest of his life. He had been happier with Donna these past two days than he had in his entire married life over the past two years. He was just trying to recapture some of that old feeling on this trip, in some small way. He realized that he loved Margaret, not only as his daughter but also as an extension of Donna. She symbolized everything good about their union. And now, he realized that he was having thoughts he shouldn’t.

    ***

    Donna ran Margaret’s bathwater and thought about Ray. Seeing him in this way, she realized he was the best man she’d ever known. Even with everything he’d been through there was still something almost hopeful about him, something refreshing and beautiful. She was having the wrong kind of thoughts about him, thoughts about how they’d been together before. She’d never felt that way about Andrew and every day she seemed to question her decision to be his wife.
    She headed downstairs to retrieve Margaret, and she wondered if it was wrong to feel this way.

    ***

    They were having a drink together, just as they had done the night before.

    “She wasn’t too hard to put down tonight.”

    “I don’t guess it’ll be too hard for me to go to sleep tonight, either. I feel like I walked from one side of the ranch today to the other. Usually I at least have a horse to ride.”

    Donna laughed. “No, I guess you didn’t have that option today. Let’s take the metro tomorrow, okay?”

    “Okay,” he said. “I really did enjoy spending time with the two of you today. It was the most fun I’ve had in a long time.”

    “I’m glad,” she replied. “I guess that means you’ll buy me dinner tomorrow.”

    She placed her hand on his and pulled it back before she knew what she was doing. “I’m sorry about that.”

    “No need to apologize.” He grabbed her hand and placed it in his. “You don’t have anything to be ashamed of.” He looked into her eyes, a look that said to her that whatever she was feeling, he must’ve been feeling the same thing. He squeezed her hand one last time and let go. “I’m going to get ready to turn in now, okay?”

    “Okay,” she said. He gave her a kiss on the cheek and then he was gone. She finished her drink and sat there in the silence, thinking to herself for a long time. What she was feeling may have been wrong, but was it still wrong if he felt the same way, too?
     
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  12. Karin Schill

    Karin Schill Super Moderator Staff Member

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    Great update. :)
    I love all the feelings that are still lingering on between Ray and Donna even though they are both married to other people now.
     
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  13. Ray&Donna

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    June 11, 1989

    Ray was trying to feed Margaret while Donna finished breakfast for the two of them. They both had experienced a fitful night of sleep, trying to understand the long-dormant feelings they had which now threatened to break the surface, and how to get through the next few days without hurting each other again.

    The phone rang, startling them both, and Donna grabbed it. “Hello? Hi, how are you?” Ray stared at her and noticed her voice seemed to get much smaller as she talked into the receiver.
    “Okay. No, I understand. Yes, she’s fine. Yes, he’s with her right now. Okay, I’ll see you then. Goodbye.” She could feel herself start to cry, but she didn’t want to do it in front of him—she was trying to save herself from making a scene.

    “Is everything okay?” he asked.

    “Yes, it’s fine,” she lied. She sat a plate of food in front of him. “I’ll be back in a moment.”
    He frowned but tried to put whatever was bothering him out of his mind, and went back to feeding his daughter.

    Donna was in the powder room, trying to clean up her makeup and feeling foolish. She started at herself in the mirror, trying to figure out how she had gotten to this point in her life. She realized she had spent too much time feeling sorry for herself the past few days and resolved to make a change. After she thought she had fixed herself sufficiently, she rejoined Ray in the kitchen.

    “Sorry about that,” she apologized. “Just some upsetting news.”

    “Okay,” he said. He didn’t want to pry into whatever was bothering her. They ate together, talking mostly about Margaret and trying to avoid anything sensitive for either of them.

    ***

    They drove down to Virginia that day to visit Mount Vernon. The drive was mostly silent, interrupted by Margaret laughing and giving snippets of things she saw along the way. Having completed the tour, they now stood behind the main house, the wind blowing across the Potomac and the breeze washing over them. Donna had a pensive look on her face, and she knew that Ray could tell something wasn’t right. With the passage of time he became more and more perceptive to her feelings, almost to a fault. Margaret had fallen asleep on Ray’s shoulder again, and he realized this was his opportunity to confront Donna about the morning’s phone call.

    “Look, I know I shouldn’t pry, but I think there’s something wrong and I just want you to know that I’m here if you need to talk.”

    “Why don’t we sit down?” she said. He motioned with his head to a bench near them. They sat and Donna stared straight ahead, not at the river as it slowly moved, but into space, into nothingness.

    “We’re separated.”

    Ray tried to feign shock but he wondered why he needed to. He let her words wash over him for a moment before saying anything. “I’m sorry to hear that.”

    “Thanks. Anyway, the call this morning was so Andrew could tell me that he wouldn’t be coming home this weekend, but that he would be gone for at least three more days.”

    “Oh?” He looked at her, trying to reconcile all of this in his mind. “I guess that’s not what you wanted to hear.”

    “I was just hoping maybe we could discuss our situation again. Things are only going to get more hectic for him as the year goes on and I just wanted to talk.”

    Ray glanced at her. “Maybe I didn’t pick the best time to be here.”

    “No, it’s fine.” She frowned, though it wasn’t directed toward him. “We’ve discussed divorce, but with it being an election year there’s nothing we can do about it right now. I know it sounds silly, but married politicians sell better than single or divorced ones.”

    He placed his free hand on hers. “I understand that. You know, I did pay some attention when I used to go to those meetings with you.”

    She laughed and smiled at him. “I hate to lay my problems on you. It’s really just something I have to figure out on my own.”

    “Well, I’ll be here to help in any way I can. I think we should probably get home though before Margaret drools any more on me.”

    Donna laughed. “Okay, I’d like that. Just try not to be so quiet on the way home, okay?”

    He nodded at her and they held hands as they walked back across the grass and toward the parking lot.
     
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  14. Karin Schill

    Karin Schill Super Moderator Staff Member

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    How convenient that Donna and Downling are separated! :D

    I like how Ray tried to comfort her and how she didn't want to cry in front of him.
     
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  15. Ray&Donna

    Ray&Donna Soap Chat TV Fanatic

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    June 11, 1989

    Margaret was still asleep and Donna appeared exhausted so after they arrived back at the townhouse Ray put them both to bed. While they slept he made some phone calls and straightened up a few things downstairs. He also decided to fix dinner that evening. He sat in the den after he had picked up some of Margaret’s toys and found a photo album laying on the end table; he wasn’t sure if he should pick it up but finally decided it would be okay. There were pictures, mostly of Margaret, though there were a few of her and Donna and one or two of the senator at society dinners. As he leafed through he found a few of himself from when Margaret was born, holding her in the hospital, and from the next year when he had come to visit. He smiled at the thought that Donna had saved these pictures of him, how despite what had gone on in their previous life and their physical separation he was still a part of her. He closed the album and laid it back on the table. He got up and headed toward the kitchen, looking around to see what kind of food was there. He found some spaghetti in the cabinet—he knew that Donna loved pasta—and found the stuff to make sauce as well. He set a few things out then went upstairs for a moment to check on Margaret. He opened her door quietly and walked inside. She was still sleeping, and he couldn’t help but think that she looked like a little angel laying there, under her blanket—his own gift from God. He closed her door softly and walked into the hall. The door to Donna’s room was still closed, and he walked toward it. He stared at the door, thinking about how little was separating them at this moment. He placed his hand on the doorknob, thinking briefly about checking on her but ultimately deciding he didn’t want to risk waking her up. He went back downstairs to the kitchen, thinking about her whole time as she filled his mind with memories of days gone by. Standing over the range he thought about how he didn’t get to cook much for anyone else and he was surprised how much he enjoyed it. He looked at the clock while he continued to get everything ready. It would be some time before for Margaret woke up, since she seemed to have a set schedule. He loved being with her and wished he could do it more often, but he knew in his heart it would probably never be possible. He went back to the task at hand, knowing he had to make the most of their precious time together.

    Upstairs, Donna had just woken up. She looked at the clock beside the bed, and noted that she had been asleep for about three hours. She knew instinctively that Margaret should be getting ready to wake up from her afternoon nap. She went to the bathroom to brush her hair and straighten up her makeup. Even while weary she was still beautiful, though she never thought about herself in that manner. She headed down the hall to check on Margaret, entering her room just as the girl began to stir. She sat on the edge of the bed and rubbed her cheek. She opened her eyes.

    “Hi mama,” she said.

    “Hi, honey.” She picked Margaret up and held her in her arms. “Daddy is downstairs, I guess. Would you like to go see him?”

    “Uh-huh.”

    “Okay.” She kissed Margaret on the forehead and they headed toward the kitchen.

    Ray was setting the table when Donna walked in, holding Margaret. He smiled at them. “I was just getting ready to come and wake you.”

    She smiled at him, thinking that at this moment he had the same twinkle in his eye as when they first met. “I can’t believe you fixed dinner. You didn’t have to go to all this trouble.”

    “It was no trouble at all. I figured you could use a break.”

    She came into the kitchen and kissed him on the cheek. “Thank you anyway.” He felt a little embarrassed but did his best not to blush.

    They talked and laughed during dinner. It was just like old times, like anything bad that had happened between them had been erased and they were a family again. It seemed as the time passed they had silently forgiven each other for past hurts.

    ***

    They went to sit in the den after dinner so they could talk. He held her hand during the conversation. “It’s really a shame that you have to be put through all of these problems. I guess it would be hard to have your life thrown into the public eye and picked apart by everyone.”

    “Yes, really hard.” She looked at him. “Thank you. Thank you for being here.”

    “I realize in the past there were a lot of times where I wasn’t there for you when I should’ve been.”


    Margaret cooed in the floor where she playing.

    “She almost makes you forget your problems, doesn’t she?”

    “She does do that,” he agreed.

    “Can I ask you about something?”

    “Anything,” he said.

    “I noticed that you haven’t called home yet.”

    “Oh. I guess it’s been pretty obvious. Just before I left, we had another huge fight. She said she didn’t want me over here. I think she’s jealous of you, and jealous of Margaret, of the connection we have. How could anyone be jealous of a child?”

    Donna shook her head. “I guess she’s just that kind of person.”

    “I don’t think she would want to be disconnected from her own child the way I am from mine. We fight at least once a week, though. I’ve thought about leaving but sometimes I don’t think I have the strength to start over.”

    “Don’t say that,” she reassured him. “You’re the strongest man I know—you could do whatever you wanted to.”

    “I’m glad you think so. I don’t know, maybe we should go to counseling or something. But things have been pretty bad for a while now.”

    Ray played with Margaret for a while, and then took her upstairs to put her to bed. Donna sat alone now, thinking to herself. Was this what it had come to? Were they both completely miserable? They had no reason to put on airs with each other, to not be completely honest about their feelings.

    Upstairs Ray kissed Margaret goodnight after he tucked her in. He closed the door and walked back out into the hall. Things seemed different now between he and Donna--any frostiness that had lingered from their divorce hadn’t been present on this trip. They seemed to be able to talk to each other freely again, sharing their feelings and emotions. He wondered what tomorrow would hold, especially after he revealed his plans for another outing. He went downstairs so they could spend the rest of the evening talking, but more than anything he just wanted to be with her, to hold her hand and watch her as she laughed. She was so beautiful when she was just being herself, and as he made his way back to where she was all he could think about was how he longed to hold her again, if only for a moment.
     
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  16. Karin Schill

    Karin Schill Super Moderator Staff Member

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    Nice update. I love how Ray made dinner. :gotcha:

    Also why am I not surprised that he and Jenna are having problems. :D
     
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  17. Mrs Bobby James Ewing

    Mrs Bobby James Ewing Soap Chat Fan

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    Great updates Ray&Donna. :) I love your story so much. :) I am really looking forward to Ray&Donna eventually reuniting with their young daughter Margaret in the near future because their marriages to Jenna and Andrew are both conveniently falling apart at the same time in your story. :) ;)
     
    Last edited: Mar 24, 2018
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  18. Ray&Donna

    Ray&Donna Soap Chat TV Fanatic

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    June 12, 1989

    Ray was up early the next morning, although living most of his life on a ranch had always meant being up early. He decided to fix breakfast; he was becoming pretty familiar with the kitchen and wanted to help Donna out as much as he could. He hated to be so secretive, but he couldn’t take her with him when he went out today.

    He left the food, covered, on the table, knowing it wouldn’t be long for Donna would be downstairs to eat. He grabbed his jacket and hat and headed for the front door.

    ***

    Donna was sad to see that Ray had gone out early—he left her a rather vague note—but she and Margaret ate together like they always did. Afterward they sat on the floor of the den playing, and Donna had the strange urge to release the feelings she had been bottling up the past few days. While she thought doing so was a bit odd, she decided to share them with Margaret.

    “Margaret, sometimes I think I made some big mistakes, ones that can’t be fixed. This is the happiest I’ve been in a long time but there’s something wrong with what I feel. Your daddy is a special man, you know that?”

    “Yes,” she said.

    Donna smiled at her. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you almost understood what I was saying. I’m trying to figure out a way to tell him how I feel, but I don’t want to seem selfish.” She patted Margaret as she held her close. “I’m starting to think I’ve put us in an impossible situation.”

    ***

    Ray had navigated the streets of Washington until he arrived at the store he was looking for, and now he was back at Donna’s front door again. He carried a large box with him and let himself in with the key she had given him to use. She was still in the den, and hadn’t heard him come home as Margaret was being rather noisy.

    “Special delivery,” he said in a mock voice. Donna heard him and went out to investigate.

    She noticed the box first. “What on earth do you have?”

    “Well, it’s a special delivery for you, pretty lady.” He balanced the box on one arm as he used the other to remove his hat and set it on the table. He handed her the box. She put it down on the console table and began to open it. He smiled as he watched her, and he wondered if she had ever looked this way to anyone else. She was overcome with emotion as she pulled back the tissue paper and saw a black dress.

    “I hope it looks okay…I was working from memory, you know.”

    “It’s perfect,” she said. She looked at it and realized it was strikingly similar to the black dress she was wearing the first time they had ever met, over ten years ago. It looked nice, but it was hard for her to believe she had ever worn something quite so flashy. She held it close to her as she looked at him. “I’m afraid I don’t understand why you’ve bought this dress for me.”

    “I’ve made reservations for us to go out tonight,” he said without pause.

    “Tonight?” She tried to appear dumbfounded but secretly she was thrilled at the idea.

    “Sure, tonight. That’s what I said.” He smiled at her and she felt a flicker of something inside herself. “I made all of the arrangements and I even had something for myself to wear delivered yesterday while you were sleeping.”

    She laughed. “A home tailoring service?” she asked.

    “Something like that.” He smiled at her again.

    Thoughts were racing like wild horses through her mind, but one in particular pushed the rest of them to the back for a minute. “What about Margaret?”

    “I’ve already taken care of that. I saw the list of numbers you keep by the phone, and I called her nanny, the one who stays with her when you’re busy, to see if she could stay with Margaret this evening. She’ll be here tonight.”

    “It sounds like you’ve thought of everything.”

    “Well, I hope so. I even got transportation. Now go do whatever you have to do and I’ll watch Margaret for a while.” He gave her a kiss on the cheek and just as quickly he was gone to the den. She heard Margaret squeal with delight as she saw him. She picked up the box and got in the elevator to go up to her room. She hadn’t been out for just an evening of fun in a long time, and she was going to take this opportunity, even if in the back of her mind a little voice was telling her that she was playing with fire. She hung up the dress and went to look for some shoes to go with it.

    Ray sat on the floor with Margaret as she played. He had worried what Donna’s reaction might be but it had been better than he could’ve imagined. She seemed willing to accept that they still shared feelings, something deeper than the two of them could have imagined. He knew he’d never felt it with anyone else and that he never would. There was a magic to the way she smiled, how she made him feel. The only thing missing was that they weren’t together, but that wasn’t important right now. Just spending this time together, with their daughter, was enough. He watched Margaret as she used her imagination to dream up things, finding joy in monotony. Everything seemed so much clearer, he thought, when it was reflected in her eyes.

    Donna came back downstairs for lunch. Ray laughed when he saw her at first, but even with curlers in her half-fixed hair she still looked beautiful. “I fixed lunch this morning and left it in the fridge,” he said.

    She looked at him. “Who are you and what have you done with Ray Krebbs?”

    He laughed. “Didn’t you learn from all those years at Southfork not to turn down free food?” he asked.

    “Point taken,” she replied. “Let me have that child so I can feed her.” He handed her Margaret and then followed the both of them to the kitchen.

    They had a wonderful lunch together. Ray thought that Donna seemed to have gotten back the sparkle that had been missing the whole time he’d been here, and there was a magic in the sound of her laughter. He began to wonder to himself why he hadn’t followed her when she first came here three years ago, but the past wasn’t important now. He knew he should make the most of the short time they had together. She watched him as he watched her, and she wondered where his mind was. Her mind had been on him and his motives these past few days. She didn’t know what he wanted from her, but then she didn’t know what she wanted, either. She just needed to be close to someone, and it helped that that someone who was there was a person with whom she shared so many memories. She wondered if it would be more selfish to keep those feelings to herself, or more selfish to reveal them to Ray. She just wanted to enjoy being with him, here in this moment, and hope that she could find a way to be happy again.
     
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  19. Mrs Bobby James Ewing

    Mrs Bobby James Ewing Soap Chat Fan

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    Happy Easter Ray&Donna and cute update.:) Ray&Donna are so cute together with their daughter Margaret and I am looking forward to their date. :)
     
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  20. Karin Schill

    Karin Schill Super Moderator Staff Member

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    Nice update Tommie. :)
    They are acting like they still were married. I mean with the whole "date night" thing and also how he bought her a new dress for the occasion.
     

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